Hotel Hell

Published On May 4, 2017 | By Raphael Baker | Lifestyle
Earlier this month, I journeyed to Michigan for business. Before my trip, I searched the web for a nice hotel close to where my activities would be held. I stumbled upon the Edward Hotel and Convention Center. Their website showcases a high-end, luxury hotel with several amenities.
After I landed in Detroit, I was escorted to Dearborn and ventured to my hotel. When I arrived, the building was sizable, and reminded me of a resort on the Las Vegas Strip. I scooted through the lobby, which was very modern and well-furnished. It even had palm trees (which I love). I patted myself on the back for what seemed like an excellent choice.
After quickly checking in, I rolled my luggage to the elevators. Although the elevator was going up, in that moment, I felt like I was descending into hell. The inside of the elevator had broken tiles, rusted metal and reeked of mold. When I exited that metallic coffin, I gasped for air. I caught my breath and found my room. I opened the door and immediately felt I was being Punk’d. The only word to describe the room is shitty. My shitty room smelled moldy and was dustier than a New Orleans tomb. “Is this the Bates Motel?” I thought. “Is Norman coming out in old lady drag to stab me up in the shower?” I went to turn on the TV and discovered that it didn’t work. As a matter of fact, the entire left side of my room didn’t have electricity. I grabbed my bags and rushed back downstairs to express my disdain. The woman at the front desk apologized and changed my room to a higher floor.
My new room was still dusty and moldy, but hey, at least the power was on. I was sleepy, so I sucked it up and counted my blessings. The next morning I got in the shower. The water began rising in the bottom of the tub. “Great”, I thought. “I’m in a damn crock pot”.
I would have changed my hotel, but the one legitimately nice hotel in the area (The Henry) was booked to capacity. Over the next few days I experienced several atrocities, including visits from tiny, six legged creatures. The hotel’s restaurant, Giulio & Sons, had bland food and horrendous service. Although the Edward’s website says there is a shuttle, there wasn’t one available for guests.
The Brew Specialty Shop and Archimedes Bar & Lounge were two blessings in an otherwise tragic situation. I needed several cups of coffee and even more adult beverages to cope with my nightmarish experience.
The Edward Hotel & Convention Center should either be shut down, or should be billed as a horror attraction. If they rename it Hotel Hell, at least guests will know exactly what to expect.


About The Author

is Owner of The Raphael Baker Agency, Co-Founder & Editor-in-Chief of Rags ‘N’ Riches Magazine, and President of Raphael Baker & Associates. He is also a writer, mentor and social critic.